This is a variety cryptic crossword that is part of the Unnecessarily series.

Context

This is part of our Unnecessarily series. Click here for an explanation of that series.

This puzzle was written as a handout puzzle for the 2019 NPL Convention. If you’re the kind of person who thinks that a convention where people who write this stuff as handouts would be fun, you should check out the National Puzzler’s League.

Hints

Starting Hints

If you’re having trouble breaking into this puzzle, you should check out these clues first.

How do I get started?
The puzzle gives a hint that you should start with the clues that fit in group 7 first. That seems like a good idea. You can tell which of the clues fit in this group by the enumerations and the grid. It's a little grindy, but the end result is edifying.
I got the clue phrase. What does it mean?
All the clues in this puzzle are fake. No matter how hard you try to solve them, they don't solve to answers. The variety instructions at the beginning do work though. (In particular, note how each one of them depends on something in the clue as opposed to something in the answer. You'll be able to follow everything you need to despite the clues not actually resolving to answers.) This is all variety, no cryptic. One might say it was... unnecessarily cryptic.
Some notes about the below clues:
Note that some parts of the clues below exist to hide the fact that the clues are fake from casual inspection. In particular, each one has a Split and a Wordplay clue, but each one of those is fake. The answer will tell you where the important part of the clue is.

Clues

Instructions

Section 4 - How is this supposed to work?
Yeah, this is probably the least clear part of this puzzle. Basically, imagine the grid was printed on the other side such that it overlapped with the original grid perfectly. The 1 in the reverse grid would be on the other side of the 15 in the original grid. The instructions use the word reverse a lot, but the end result is that you're poking a hole in the reverse grid in the clue number for each clue in this section. So for example, if 3D were a reverse clue, that would cause you to poke a hole in the grid where the number 13 is in the original grid.
Okay I did everything, now what?
This is a 15x10 grid. That means it can easily be divided into 5x5 grids.

Answers

Overall
If you spend some time trying to solve the clues, you're going to get very frustrated. Some of the clues look like they're close to working, but just won't quite get there. Some others parse correctly as a cryptic clue, but imply that we've done something impossible. (For example, 36A implies that we've somehow found an anagram of Reykjavik that is a flightless bird, which is just not happening.)

After some frustration, hopefully you turn to the hint at the end of the instructions that tells you focus on the clues that sort into group 7. You can figure out these clues just from looking at the grid and follow the instructions to get the phrase SKIP CLUES, HEED DIRECTIONS.

All of the clues are fake, but you can still follow the directions anyway, which indicate things you should do in the grid. Each individual group has their own spoiler below this one. When you follow all of those instructions, you get the grid below.



This may look like gibberish, but you can split the grid up into 5x5 squares. When you do that, letters start to form.



Hehe. GOTCHA!
Group 1 - Colors
Each of the clues in this group contain the name of a Crayola Crayon color. For each of these clues, color in the whole entry in the grid associated with them.

19A - BLUE
44A - BURNT ORANGE
49A - WISTERIA
13D - WILD STRAWBERRY
33D - MAUVELOUS

Group 2 - Spices
Each of the clues in this group contain the name of a spice. For each of these clues, color in the whole entry in the grid associated with them except for the first and last space.

1A - SAGE
25A - BASIL
27A - BAY LEAVES
1D - MACE
22D - STAR ANISE

Group 3 - Sports
Each of the clues in this group contain the name of a Colorado sports team. Note that each of these clues begins with the letter Y, so the first two sections of the complicated set-up are never used. (Hopefully we scared you into thinking that you'd need to take the derivatives of words though!) This means that you color in every other letter of the clue's entry in the grid, starting with the second letter.

17A - AVALANCHE
39A - NUGGETS
6D - ROCKIES
32D - BRONCOS
41D - RAPIDS

Group 4 - Palindromes
Each of the clues in this group contains a 7 letter palindromic sequence. Imagine the grid was printed on the other side such that it overlapped with the original grid perfectly. The 1 in the reverse grid would be on the other side of the 15 in the original grid. The instructions use the word reverse a lot, but the end result is that you're poking a hole in the reverse grid in the clue number for each clue in this section. So for example, for 2D, that would cause you to poke a hole in the grid where the number 14 is in the original grid.

23A - icebeRG ANAGRam
51A - typE "LOLOL" Etc.
2D - philantroPIST SIPhons
4D - NIECE INjured
24D - mozarT REPERToire

Group 5 - Shared Words
Each of the clues in this group contains 3 words that are shared between two clues. Color in the space where the two clues intersect in the grid.

6A & 9D - incomplete, limitless, starts
10A & 11D - straight, about, activities
13A & 15D - survivor, cast, island
42A & 36D - paper, dogs, chad
52A & 29D - seal, takes, child

Group 6 - Rocks
Each of the clues in this group a word that begins with the letter R and ends with the letter K. Take the first letters of the clues above and below it and use that as coordinates in the defined coordinate system to find a square to color in.

36A - Reykjavik - CY
47A - Ragnarok - JU
8D - rework - HP
26D - Robotnik - GP
37D - rook - JR

Group 7 - Other
Each of the clues in this group has an enumeration that is too long given the entry in the grid. Find the difference between the entry and the enumeration, and use that to shift the first letter of the clue that many spaces.

16A - 8→25 - B→S
18A - 4→7 - F→I
20A - 9→16 - V→C
21A - 5→8 - R→U
30A - 5→8 - P→S
31A - 7→13 - Y→E
34A - 7→8 - C→D
46A - 3→28 - J→I
48A - 6→16 - U→E
50A - 4→8 - P→T
3D - 3→5 - M→O
5D - 6→9 - P→S
7D - 4→7 - H→K
10D - 4→7 - M→P
12D - 7→12 - G→L
14D - 5→7 - C→E
28D - 6→7 - G→H
35D - 5→7 - C→E
38D - 4→24 - J→D
39D - 4→5 - Q→R
40D - 4→8 - Y→C
43D - 3→7 - E→I
45D - 3→6 - K→N

Then, split the two sections in half to get the strings SICUSEDIETOS and KPLEHEDRCIN. Perform the appropriate shuffle to get SKIP CLUES, HEED DIRECTIONS, which is your hint to how to solve the rest of the puzzle.